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Find Your Fix
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You're one step closer to happiness! Pop a pill (or 10!) for:

- luscious hair 

- nails hard enough to chop wood 

- smooth, glowing radiant skin 

- the ability to a ignore all injustice in the world

- enabling the slow down of the brain (less opinions, less stress)

- a jolly good time!

- HAPPINESS

Happy Pills 

Pop your way to victory!

Tea Tox-ic 

Turn-to-dust Tea

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Shed those pounds and drink your way to thin air with the most toxic tea on the market!

Benefits also include:

- Better chakra alignment

- Detox' negative vibes

- Ability to absorb free dole energy from the earth's core

Commit daily for 0 life-changing results.

Disclaimer - trips to the toilet will increase.

Drink your way to a blissful oblivion, with a power shot of ANTIoxidants. Helps to improve energy, mood, and focus.  A clinical blend of total b*llocks, with potent adaptogenic juices that help regulate mood-swings to reduce the effects of stress, particularly eliminating the bad vibes which will inevitably come your way. 

Commit daily for 0 life-changing results

Beauty Booze

Bad-vibe-beating Beverage

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A SUPER-sauce, which supports the appearance of smooth firm, hydrated skin. With a combination of collagen, ceramides, astaxathin and a squirt of ketchup. 

*These statements have not been evaluated by any form of Health or Food Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease. But it will provide a super cute, insta post.

Self-Care Sauce

Smothering SUPER-Sauce

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Costing only 1 days work, Optimizing Oil, helps to improve energy and mood. With potent adaptogenic juices this concoction will regulate levels of inadequacy

 

Disclaimer - made because you simply are not good enough. 

Commit daily for 0 life-changing results.

Optimizing Oil 

Energising-Oil Supplement

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A clinical blend of dust particles, with an array of 9 potently dosed ingredients to wake you up to the realities of the world. It is a combination of caffeine, plant extracts and dust particles - unlike anything else on the market today. 

Disclaimer - each particle of dust was carefully extracted by the intern, from our office floor. 

Commit daily for 0 life-changing results.

Brain Dust 

Dust for a Dusty Brain

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Tried and Tested